It seems like every guy and his big brother has a post on their blog for girls about modesty. 'Course, girls have modesty posts for girls too, but there seems to me to be a much greater variety to be observed within that genre. Guys- you are saying nothing new. Whatever is contained in your post we've probably already encountered on the blog of several other guys several other times. I realize that some guys might not be claiming to be saying new things, and I guess that the internet is a relatively free place and I therefore can't judge guys for being redundant. I can, however, post a ranty blog post about them.
There are many, many things that guys don't seem to appreciate (or really understand) about modesty, and, of these many things, the practical side of it is probably the most widespread. I'd love to take a guy shopping with me for a day to show him how hard it is to have a wardrobe of modest things. I despise shopping, but it would be a nice reality check, I think.
There are at least four things girls have to look for when they're buying clothes, and the first is a proper fit. I don't know who people in the fashion industry think they're designing clothes for (I suspect aliens), but real people's bodies are NOT AT ALL LIKE WHATEVER THEY'RE USING AS REFERENCES. Some girls have a hard time with tops, others can't find pants, and some poor dears have trouble with both. I cry for those girls. Tops are prone to fitting properly on the chest and either being too flowy or too tight on the torso and then fitting on the torso and gapping on the chest. Pants are Hades. They're too long, too light, and too loose all at the same time. Basically, trying on clothes sucks, okay? Those of you guys that live with girls or have been otherwise exposed to members of the female variety getting really excited about clothes finally fitting them properly, this is why.
The next thing is actually looking attractive. Okay, you might've found something that fits you tolerably well, but what about the color? Does it drown you out to the point of making you look like a vampire? Does the pattern make your body type resemble an oompa loompa more than a person? Would the style be more suited do a woman 60 years your senior? I myself have, from time to time, bought articles of clothing that I don't particularly like on me just because I needed clothes desperately and it was the only thing I could find that fit me properly. "Besides," thought I, "maybe it'll grow on me!" It didn't grow on me.
Now, say you've done the impossible and have found something that fits you fabulously and makes you look just as fabulous- you're not done just yet! You also have to think about the last two things- cost and modesty. This point needs an example. Hm... oh, I know! Swimsuits. Every girl on the face of the planet hates swimsuit shopping. Off the top of my head, I'd say that you could get a regular old bikini for like 15 or 20 bucks. Modest swimsuits? They can and will very, very easily cost you 2-3 times that, sometimes more. I don't know about y'all, but that is not within my budget.
Of these four things, you can really only realistically expect to meet three of them, so a girl's gotta prioritize. Which is the least necessary- being modest, not going to the poorhouse, looking good, or not looking like a disproportionate photoshop failure? Please choose quickly so that society can judge you for whichever decision you make.
So, that's the literal, physical, practical side of modesty, but there's also the abstract side. Girls are hardwired from the moment of their birth to be loved, cherished, and protected (that's reason #1 why good dads are so important). Just like guys need to feel needed, girls need to feel wanted. Not feeling wanted makes us do stupid things, like going out in public half naked and posting statuses Facebook statuses fishing for compliments in a desperate hope that maybe we can get just enough of a self-esteem boost to get us through another day. I'm not condoning this behavior, mind- there's a difference between excusing and explaining- but there is a reason for it when it happens. I'd say that there's a reason for it other than hormones, but that wouldn't be entirely true. If you want to live long and prosper, I'd advise against saying that aloud in the presence of a female.
Back to my point here, sometimes girls dress immodestly because they don't know better, and sometimes they're just lazy, but sometimes they dress immodestly because they feel like the only way that they're ever going to get the attention that they crave is by showing skin. It's perverted and sick and wrong and not true but also very much what is happening in the world today. These girls don't need our judgment or our admonitions, they need our love.
I could go on and on, but, essentially, all I'm trying to say here is that modesty is a whole lot bigger than just picking one shirt out of the closet and not picking out a different one. Guys have their sins that they're hardwired to be tempted to and so do girls. Immodesty is a sin, yes, but it's also a sin that, shocker, can probably be much more effectively dealt with by using less self-righteous condemnations and more unconditional love.
There are many, many things that guys don't seem to appreciate (or really understand) about modesty, and, of these many things, the practical side of it is probably the most widespread. I'd love to take a guy shopping with me for a day to show him how hard it is to have a wardrobe of modest things. I despise shopping, but it would be a nice reality check, I think.
There are at least four things girls have to look for when they're buying clothes, and the first is a proper fit. I don't know who people in the fashion industry think they're designing clothes for (I suspect aliens), but real people's bodies are NOT AT ALL LIKE WHATEVER THEY'RE USING AS REFERENCES. Some girls have a hard time with tops, others can't find pants, and some poor dears have trouble with both. I cry for those girls. Tops are prone to fitting properly on the chest and either being too flowy or too tight on the torso and then fitting on the torso and gapping on the chest. Pants are Hades. They're too long, too light, and too loose all at the same time. Basically, trying on clothes sucks, okay? Those of you guys that live with girls or have been otherwise exposed to members of the female variety getting really excited about clothes finally fitting them properly, this is why.
The next thing is actually looking attractive. Okay, you might've found something that fits you tolerably well, but what about the color? Does it drown you out to the point of making you look like a vampire? Does the pattern make your body type resemble an oompa loompa more than a person? Would the style be more suited do a woman 60 years your senior? I myself have, from time to time, bought articles of clothing that I don't particularly like on me just because I needed clothes desperately and it was the only thing I could find that fit me properly. "Besides," thought I, "maybe it'll grow on me!" It didn't grow on me.
Now, say you've done the impossible and have found something that fits you fabulously and makes you look just as fabulous- you're not done just yet! You also have to think about the last two things- cost and modesty. This point needs an example. Hm... oh, I know! Swimsuits. Every girl on the face of the planet hates swimsuit shopping. Off the top of my head, I'd say that you could get a regular old bikini for like 15 or 20 bucks. Modest swimsuits? They can and will very, very easily cost you 2-3 times that, sometimes more. I don't know about y'all, but that is not within my budget.
Of these four things, you can really only realistically expect to meet three of them, so a girl's gotta prioritize. Which is the least necessary- being modest, not going to the poorhouse, looking good, or not looking like a disproportionate photoshop failure? Please choose quickly so that society can judge you for whichever decision you make.
So, that's the literal, physical, practical side of modesty, but there's also the abstract side. Girls are hardwired from the moment of their birth to be loved, cherished, and protected (that's reason #1 why good dads are so important). Just like guys need to feel needed, girls need to feel wanted. Not feeling wanted makes us do stupid things, like going out in public half naked and posting statuses Facebook statuses fishing for compliments in a desperate hope that maybe we can get just enough of a self-esteem boost to get us through another day. I'm not condoning this behavior, mind- there's a difference between excusing and explaining- but there is a reason for it when it happens. I'd say that there's a reason for it other than hormones, but that wouldn't be entirely true. If you want to live long and prosper, I'd advise against saying that aloud in the presence of a female.
Back to my point here, sometimes girls dress immodestly because they don't know better, and sometimes they're just lazy, but sometimes they dress immodestly because they feel like the only way that they're ever going to get the attention that they crave is by showing skin. It's perverted and sick and wrong and not true but also very much what is happening in the world today. These girls don't need our judgment or our admonitions, they need our love.
I could go on and on, but, essentially, all I'm trying to say here is that modesty is a whole lot bigger than just picking one shirt out of the closet and not picking out a different one. Guys have their sins that they're hardwired to be tempted to and so do girls. Immodesty is a sin, yes, but it's also a sin that, shocker, can probably be much more effectively dealt with by using less self-righteous condemnations and more unconditional love.
